Thursday, July 20, 2006

Screamin' Cyn Cyn and The Pons - Sticker Book

This is ohmygodimmike. I'm posting a song by screaming cyn-cyn and the pons, they're a cool band from Madison WI. I am supposed to write about general culture, that means shit talk at the end of the song. My co-bloggers wrote about j-punk and John Waters on there first post. Anyone who likes john Waters is a sick individual. Also, everyone knows J-rap is where it's at, not j-punk. at least if you're a real I-talian.

In our picture we are in the lake of the devil. you can see it conforming into our faces. Like a devil in the forest and into the rocks. Streaming our conscience over our picture.

I Don't know how I'm suppose to write about culture when I'm American. It's hard for Americans to write about culture when they don't listen to any music without guitars and don't watch any movies with subtitles. Maybe this post will be about spirtual bonding with the third world. An american tourist in Manilla tries buying pot from a street vendor. The next thing he knows he's in a phillipino jail with smugglers from all across the world. He tries to explain his situation by stating that he isn't a criminal and he's only here becuase he was falsely accused of trying to bring a remote strain of asian mushroom to cure south Americans who were suffering from symptoms previously unknown to south America. Obvioulsy this was a lie, and the other prisoners knew it and came up with ellaborate lies as to why they were in prison.

By the time he was released (3 months later) he had very misconcieved judgments of law in southeast asia. He was under the impression that petting a dog on the abdomen was highly illegal in the Phillipines. He knew that prostitution was legal but was told that not ejaculating into a germatically sealed container was prosicuted to the highest degree. This was so all American tourists who visited the brothels could have there holy DNA procreated into the Phillipino society. Everyone in the jail laughed when they realized he believed them. So when they raped him they said they would send their sperm to his mother so she could have the child of the man who tore his ass-hole wide and gapping.

Why do I tell this story, I don't know and you have even less idea than I do, so I welcome your comments.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Jesus, that story was disgusting and distasteful. The reason why you wrote it is becuase you have no idea how to write.

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